looking for a purpose

just reflect on it, check it, think about it.
reluctant to figure the path, can't move forward.
stay back, stick to what you know.
the mind tells otherwise, the pulse feels otherwise.
what's the expression? the exposure?
the emotions run wild, forced to be paused.
go on, leave never.
seek the hide, seek the soldier.

-meeals

you's an ignant, TRICK.

uh.. yeah, I guess so.

Fuck you up the ass you fraud ass bitch. I hate you. End of discussion. :)

- meals

p.s I miss bonus.

less than three

oh how I've missed you. :)

so excited; just less than three.

I'm so excited to see my besty tmr!! Yay DREAM'ers we's heading to Winnipeg, yao yao. lol Hella excited. It's just pretty amazing, Jenn is going places and getting to teach those who are hungry to learn! OW. =D Wheeeeee... it's gonna be a weird time shift. AGAIN! Haha I wasn't used to it last time, I wonder if I'll be used to it this time. lmao. well, I don't know what else to say so imma go. byeeee

less than threee.

-meals

it's like we's on tour y'all.

So, I've never been so free! :D I love this feeling so much. Today practically felt like the longest day of my life, but it was a day to notice all the memories that are being made. Wow, we probably wasted a lot of gas today, but could never waste the time spent with all of my friends. Surrey Fest for all girls to Metro for all boys to Richmond for wedding to Tinsletown for Felly's bday and to Simply D for a sake ending night. So many performances, so much fun. I love it. Aw, couldn't ask for anything more. Yay, new friend. Amado Cruz. =b hahaha yeah, he's cool I guess. Jenn, I love Jenn. omg. I just love every dreamer.

Yo Winnipeg, we's be hittin' up your town very soon. Just 5 days away. CAN'T WAIT. Gonna be with Gerwyn and Theron. Woo. =b It's gonna be so fucking dowp. I already know it. haha :D I can't wait. So excited to unite with my uniters. LMAO. Aww snap. Yayer.

Right now, spending my quality time with Swana. Ow ow. Yeah, haven't been here in so long, especially sleeping over. Yay. :D More to come in the future, I have a lot to look forward to. :D

- April 11; Bonus' class
- April 16-19; Winnipeg, In The Zone 4
- April 23; Chill with Jules =D
- April 24; All Girls Sleepover

but.. yeah that's all for now I THINK. Don't know... Never KNOW the future.

- baybuh meals.

exhausted.

I'm exhausted. So exhausted. I feel like I haven't been able to just lay down and sleep. Maaan. I want to sleep, but I can't I have to stay up just for a few more hours.. Have to wait til they arrive, then I can fall asleep in no man's land. My sleep territory. Success. I'm getting excited to sleep?! That's not good.. Lol.

- meals

when I think about love;

Ryan Leslie, you are amazing.

so beautiful, just for the night;

can't wait, it's gonna look sick. something been wanting for a long time.

- meals

pursuit of happiness

Je m'appelle "Miss Keener".. Pourquoi? Parce que, Dominic appelle moi ça.

H'anyways... Haha. Today was pretty boring, couldn't stay still. It's like I had A.D.D or something. I don't know. Haha! I'm so in the feel for some heat, like hella heat yenno? Like some L.A weather. Surprisingly, I didn't take a nap today.. I thought I would K.O when I got home from school, but nowp. Not today! Yipeee Kiyay. I'm here writing to you my dearest, the interetweb.. My blog! Ow Ow! But, to be honest.. I really don't have anything to write, so I'm just gonna end it off here! :) Adios, Ciao.

Go to my HOMEBREAD'S page.Click hurrr :) Follow it!

"Can I save you from you?"

- meeals

like a g6.

So.. Not so much of sticking around and updating, I so sucky at writing about my life. But than again who would be interested?! Haha, just sayin' naaww mean? Well, just a little touch base on what's been poppin' in the meals hood.. I've been busy schoolin' it out, working to get that dough(not gon' happen with the olympics aftermath), dancin' my heart out when I can, and chillin' with 'em friends. What can I say? I got a pretty average life. But y'all just don't know how I live it up! What cchaaaaa gotta say! :)

Since y'all are dowwwp, and I got some pretty dowwp and down to earth people.. Check out my boy's page: http://littleyellowmachinegun.blogspot.com, he's a hella talented artist. I look up to him, literally. His talent is unbelievable. Follow him up, talk to him, he's chill. Get to know the mind behind this amazing artist, King Duque.

Well, I'm just straight rambling since I haven't written in this shit in a while. BUT, if you're a dancer and interested to blow off some steam and take class. There's going to be a BOOGIEZONE workshop at Scotia Dance Centre on March 28th. It'll be $40 for the whole workshop and $20 per class. You don't wanna miss out! Elm Pizzaro, Jackie Lautchang and Jenn Galo will be teaching. More details hit me up!

This is ALL for now. Gotta hit up some homework, yenno the regular life of a student. Study books, write 'em papers, and ace that test.

-- meals.

*chao outside moddafuckaaa.. hahhaha!

just a change or two.

*sigh...

I miss how everything was before..
Just before everything went wrong.
Our talks, our moments, our love.
All of it just changed.
I miss it, I miss it a lot..
It's either to leave or stay.
I wish it was just that easy.

Just a little.

So, you just need to back off just a little...
Sorry.

Not so CHEESE, but I'll try.

So.. Meet Chris a.k.a Bonus.



Lets start this off by saying.. He's the best boyfriend ever. Yeah, I know.. So cheese, but hey.. It's true. I remembered when we first said "Hi" at Main street station.. He had such a deep voice, I was actually scared of him, but we started talking and everything was fine. I was bringing him to the studio for his FIRST dance classes at DREAM. From there, the story began writing itself.

I don't think I can ever explain how he makes me feel, he's so sweet, he's kind, he's cute, he's a dope ass mother effin' dancer, he's a sick graphic designer, he's caring, he's loving, he's a boy, but really.. those are all words. Nothing can ever compare to the love he gives me. I can list a million things about him, but it can't show you how much he loves me or how much he means to me.

To be honest, I didn't think I was gonna have anything for Bonus.. I thought we were just gonna be good friends. I kept thinking "yeah, I don't think me and Bonus will EVER go out. He wouldn't like me.. like wtf?".. But who would of thought I was wrong. He's someone so special that I don't want to lose. We've known each other for 4 years and out of those 4 years, 2 of the years.. I fell for him. Silly as that may sound.. "Really? two years?" Well, yes. TWO YEARS.

It all started back at my first party with the "oldies" and "youngins" .. I threw a huge party just for the two separate groups. All I remember was when we were all walking back to my house from the park.. Me and Bonus were holding hands walking down a hill.. And I thought it was the cutest thing in the world. I felt like he just took my heart and never gave it back. It was just right. From then on, we never spoke of that night and I always wondered why. But I never got my answer. Til another came along, he took me away once again. Me and some of the DREAM'ers went out for a late night dinner, as a celebration of a show we just did.. and once again.. We were holding hands.. and I really thought it was something, so I kept texting him, but little did I know. He didn't see me in that way. So, things didn't work out for us.. but since then.. I've been trying to move on for a while, liking other guys, but guess what? Didn't work. I still fell for him either way.

Yeah, say it's cheese, but it's true. I fell for him even when I tried to move on. He just took my heart and never gave it back. I just chased after him to get it back, but that didn't work either because now I'm with him. Which is the best for me 'cause now I don't have to keep wondering what would things be like with him. I don't have to wonder anymore because it's now reality. I love it, I love him. He's what I wanted and that's for real. He puts that smile on my face, with no question asked. He always asks me "Why do you think I'm such a good boyfriend?" and I can never answer him... and he always says "See, you can't even say why!" but really.. I had no words to explain it.. I couldn't explain how I felt for two years.. Theres no words out there to explain the feelings I have for him. Because I'm just happy where I am with him.

Whether other girls like him, I know I can always put my trust in him because he will never let me down. I can never question his sincerity to me. Theres never a time where I question myself is this a mistake? But only once.. When he shut me down, but ever since.. There was no questions asked. I wanted him and I was certain. I can keep writing more and more, but really.. I'll just be writing, but no one will ever feel that love I feel from him. So, I'll let everyone know now. I love Chris, and theres no doubt about that.

P.S. I'm a sucker for dark brown eyes.

- Melay.

Hi,

you're a fucking idiot,

end of discussion.

I'm a dumb ass.

Wow, I say I want photography as a career or as a side hobby.. but I'm not doing shit about it. I haven't even started on my fucking portfolio. WHAT THE EFF AM I WAITING FOR? All I have to say is wow.. I'm just so disappointed with myself. I don't even have the money to go get my camera. Like what the hell. Can life just be so dam expensive? ): I wish I had the money. I wish I wasn't a dumb ass and spent all my money on dum shit. My vent of the day. bye.

aw, my boyfriend's the best.

So, my boyfriend's the fricken best. He makes me uber happy, that's just perfect!! Haha! He did the cutest thing today.. So me, Elwin and Ian left his house.. and he said his goodbyes to us.. then I noticed that I heard some footsteps behind me, I looked back and there was Bonus.. ha standing there. He gave me a huge hug and kiss and walked away. IAN and ELWIN my bimbos.. made me blush like a motha facker. They kept saying "awww" .. hahah ugggh, but yeah. Bonus is fawking dope. Ya k bye.

Oh and today I went to ON BBQ h'omg, had so much. Glad to know to have another fam like them! Yes for OLD NAVY y'all! haha from egg toss to bread eating contest to paper plane contest.. haha shit just so much fun. haha gotta fricken love them.

- meals

p.s I miss Bonus.

I want to beat you up.

Stop fucking around with my best friend. K thanks. You're just another problem to her. Can you NOT see? I want to hit you with a skateboard right now... You're putting a very bitter taste in my mouth about YOU. You're just turning into another asshole. ASSHOLE.

- meals

L.A in ... 3 hours!

Holy shit, now it's only fucking 3 hours away! h'omg. I'm excited! Me and Mina are just chilling at Joe's house.. Well, actually we're helping him pack and it's 12:30am.. what a goon. LOL. He's packing 3 hours before we leave.. HAHA! I'll update more later! BYE <3

- meals.

p.s I miss my lover, hobbs.

I'm going going back back to Cali Cali..

Aww yeee, I'm hella excited! Heading there in just a few hours! Shoot.. meeting up with the Vibers, I can't believe it. I miss the Vibers so much, I can't wait to see them again! Woo, and I miss L.A!! This will be such a great trip, DREAM boogiezone week.. Gigi's video reel.. Training.. Fun times! Well, anyways moving on to something different.. I miss my Hobbs a lot.. <3 Aw, I wanted to see him in L.A, but I don't get to see him until.. who knows when. ): Hopefully soon.. end of the summer maybe? (: Well, update later. Buh bye.

- meals

Best Friend, Christopher Martin.

So, yesterday was his last day.. Sigh.. I miss him already ): .. It's going to be a little weird knowing I won't see him everyday.. aww man, I needa go to Colorado soon? haha. Maybe I should, go see Mikey and Hobbs too <3 I miss you Chris Martin, thanks for the new memories! I love you a lot, hope you have a great flight back home.

- meals